Funny Money Travels: Toronto.

If you've ever heard someone say, "Man, money is funny right now." you know that this means your man is broke, or damn near broke. For those of you who are hearing this phrase used for the first time here, you learned something new today. Funny Money Travels is just my way of showing everyday people that travel is not just for the wealthy and affluent. Some people are actually afraid to travel outside of their sphere, afraid of what they may encounter. Most often the actuality is that what they are afraid of is staring back at them from the mirror they find in their own house. In this culture of fear that we live in, we are told to be "ever vigilant" and "report any suspicious activities", as if everyone should be considered a suspect. What a sad state of affairs our humanity has become, that we can be herded into such monstrous thinking. Exposure to new places is scientifically proven to change the road map of your brain. New circuits are born and stagnant thinking is melted away. I'm not an expert, just a girl who wants to see the world. Enjoy.

My husband and I got a bit of a late start in planning our summer excursions this year, as our home city of Baltimore seems to be on the cosmopolitan come-up and had a ton of FREE activities, festivals, fairs and concerts going on in June and July.

We penciled in our first trip for the third weekend in July. I had been in books-a-million purusing the latest travel titles, and thinking about where we could go for a moderately priced, culuturally rich, mini vacation experience. I happened upon a Frommer's Guide for Toronto, Ontario (Canada). By p. 12 I was making hotel reservations at the Hilton Toronto. We landed a four star, King Sized Suite for $50 dollars a night on a weekend, and last minute! I think it was a clearance rate. There are also a ton of other options for accommodation. Youth Hostels, Bed and Breakfasts and Couchsurfing.com, are just some of the choices. I am a little more adventurous than my husband, so we settled on the Hilton (not much of a compromise of you ask me, I would've preferred Canadiana Backpacker's Inn ).

Decidedly, the most cost effective way for us to arrive in Toronto (wallet and bank accounts intact) would be to rent a car from BWI, make the 9-hour drive through Pennsylvania and Buffalo, NY and arrive in Toronto passing Niagara on the way in. Entry requirements for U.S. citizens (as of July 2007) are a certified birth certificate and a gov't issued ID. There are other forms of ID you can use, see the State Department website for more info.

We picked up our rental from Avis (BWI Location: $65.00 for the weekend, FREE upgrade to a 2007 Mustang convertible) and left Baltimore around 4:00 pm on Friday, July 27. BAD MOVE. Weekend traffic+rush hour traffic+roadwork = slow and tedious crawl along the interstate. Although the Pennsylvania wind farm made for a beautiful sight along the way.

Now I know that at some point during the trip preparations, I promised my husband I would be his co-pilot (a.k.a. help him stay awake, by staying awake myself) but 2:00 am came so quickly and we had already sang our way through Lauryn and D'Angelo, India Arie, John Legend, 'Lil Brother and the Minstrel Show, even rhymed our way through a bit of FREEWAY and Beanie Seigel. Apparently, I slept most of the way. Nevertheless, we arrived safely at our destination around 6:00 am Saturday morning. The sun had never looked so beautiful, rising slowly over Lake Ontario spreading its tangerine rays upon every surface that would accept them.

When we got to the hotel we moved quickly. Check In. Shower. Read the complimentary copy of the local paper. Review the itinerary and execute the mission: See the best of Toronto in 24 hours. Frommer's Guide provides a handy little sample plan for seeing the city in two days, three days or seven days. Book in hand, we make our exit and jump in our car for the 20 minute trek to downtown.

Now I know it sounds a little kitschy, but we figured the best way to see the city and get to know Toronto, straight from the experts, was to buy an all day pass for the Hop On Hop Off City Tour offered by Gray Line, 184 Front St. E. (416/594-3310). $27US per adult, picks up at various stops throughout the city and drops you off at those same points so that you have the opportunity to view Toronto at your own pace with the added benefit of the guided tour when you're on the bus.

We hopped on at the CN Tower and hopped off at Dundas Square, the center of Downtonwn Toronto and the Entertainment District and adjacent to the lesser know "Green Friendly District", think Bob Marley not Whole Foods. We learned some really cool things and lots of good information along the way. . Our first meal, a late brunch, was at Fran's which according to Frommer's is a long-standing Toronto culinary institution, famous for their Belgian Waffles and Canadian Bacon (I don't do pig). I started my meal with a fresh Pina Colada smoothie made with yogurt, fresh pineapple and coconut milk...not too sweet and incredibly delicious. My meal consisted of hash and potatoes, which was marginal at best. James ordered a tall glass of freshly squeezed orange juice and a cheese omelette with roasted potatoes. he didn't stop eating long enough to voice a complaint, so I'm guessing it was all good. Brunch was $20.00US (plus $5.00US for the tip). The food wasn't spectacular to me, but the service was very friendly and super-efficient and the outdoor cafe style seating made it a place I would definitely visit again. Only next time, I'll order the Belgian.

Fran's is located directly across the street from the largest mall in Toronto, The Eaton Centre. But I think if you've seen one mall, you've seen them all. The undistinguished food court, complete with 'Bourbon Chicken' vendors and the usual line-up of retail stores. The only thing worth remembering was Michael Snow's installation of soaring Canada geese under the skylight. We're not mall kind of people. Money is best spent on eats and sights. Moving on.

Our next stop was the International Festival at the Harborfront, a short ride from Dundas Square via the large topless yellow bus. The highlight of this festival had to be a stunning performance by a group of Montreal-based artists who go by the name 'Nomadic Massive'. They consist of 6 group members and between them speak 12 different languages. They represent such far away places as China, Argentina, Angola, Baghdad, Haiti and France. James and I took in the FREE concert (thanks to The City of Toronto) under the shade of the outdoor lake front concert hall. The day was warm, everywhere we looked there were smiling faces. Brown, yellow, peach, black and olive. Like a cornucopia of earth's fruits. I've never felt that human. Just human. That day I wasn't a Black woman, a Puerto Rican girl or an Iroquois daughter. I was just a soundwave, a spike of energy, an observer, a student of the Universe. It was a cool feeling. After hearing the track , James and I kind of looked at each other and silently signaled that their CD would become part of our repertoire.

Lunch was next. Our absolute favorite food, second only to Sushi, would have to be Korean. Along Younge St. were endless storefronts with large photos of Bulgogi, a traditional Korean dish: soy sauce, ginger and scallion marinated beef short ribs grilled until crispy and served with pickled Korean vegetables, salted dried minnows and other yummies. We closed our eyes and did the "eenie, meenie, miney, mo" number and landed on Cho Ga Jip, a small mom and pop style joint. The service was cheerful and the food was incredible. I kept thinking to myself, "Why the hell are these people so happy up here?" Then I remembered something I read in Frommer's...we'll cover that in the next paragraph *winks. I had three bowls of sweet pickled turnip, julienned and slightly crunchy like strings of green papaya; only better. The Bulgogi was served with Korean BBQ Chicken and Korean BBQ Brisket, all cooked to perfection and calling my name from their plate with a sweet, spicy, tang. Little bowls of jasmine rice accompanied, steaming and tender the long grains were a perfect pair to the grilled meats. Mmmmm....Lunch for the two of us including drinks, came to $15.00US (plus $5.00US tip).

On full stomachs and happy hearts we ventured down and up, and up and down Younge Street. It's like Toronto's answer to Times Square. We were finally able to walk off some of our meal, and soon found ourselves smack in the middle of the "Green Friendly" zone I mentioned earlier. Affectionately referred to as "Youngsterdam" by tourists and locals alike, this corridor runs from Wellesley to Bloor Street and, I would think that by my previous references to "green" and Bob Marley you've gotten the idea. Canada's laws on the use and distribution of Marijuana are very relaxed. I will now politely decline to divulge any intricate details about this leg of the trip. A lady has to exercise some discretion, after all. But I will tell you this, if you ever find yourself in Toronto be sure to stop by the Kindred Cafe. They make a brownie milkshake that is almost literally "out of this world" - made for conversations with fellow "milkshakers" on topics such as: The Ages of the Universe, The Current State of Global Humanity and The Global Consciousness. Make no mistake, the chef at Kindred takes his culinary game very seriously. This brotha brought James and I a plate of mini-brownies. Those "special kind" of brownies, served with chocolate ganache and crushed raspberries that had been mascerated in lemon juice, sugar and a special oil made from hemp seed. Emeril don't have nothing on this, I promise you! My experience with the folks at Kindred Cafe has assured me that there are an abundance of beautiful spirits in this world, the energy at The Kindred Cafe feels safe, and strangely like a home you forgot you had. I consider them new members of my extended family and I'll be returning to visit them as soon as I possibly can. Milkshake $13.00US ea. Membership $5.00US(required for rooftop access). Extra Brownies: FREE. Kindred Cafe: Priceless.

The next morning came entirely too quickly and we soon found ourselves driving off into the Canadian sunset top down, a 98 point Cuban in hand, sweet tobacco smoke circling 'round our heads, dreading our return to the doldrums of life not traveled and reveling in the beauty that is Toronto, Ontario. Thanking the Creator for the spirit of adventure, and the burning desire to see more. After this trip I purchased "How to Become a Home-Based Travel Agent" because everyone should live a life filled with experiences such as these.

Total Trip Time: 72
Hours Total Trip Cost: $420.00 US

Next in the Funny Money Travels series: Kenya, Belize, Peru or Munich. Spring Break 2008 -- Family Style.

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