Madea goes to jail

Here's what I learned from watching Tyler Perry's new film (no, not in the theater -- I'll NEVER pay for this garbage). I might add some stuff as I reflect more -- as I was watching it there was so much stuff I was thinking, but some of it was lost by the time I got a chance to write.

During the first 20 minutes of the film, I thought that maybe I wasn't laughing because there was some sort of geographical cultural divide -- me being a northern "negro" and all, I thought maybe I was just out of touch with down-home southern negro comedy. But about an hour into the film, I changed my mind. So yeah, I "learned" that:

Thugs and pimps are devils. There is no understanding why they do what they do.

All black men who play the capitalist game and work their way up in the system are angels sometimes. And when they are not angels, they are always at least goodhearted hardworking humans with pure intentions.

Light skinned black women who have worked their way up in the same system that the black men have worked, are manipulative and cold -- this is probably how they've achieved their success.

Steve Harvey, Michael Baisden, Al Sharpton, and Tom Joyner are today's black leaders.

Bourgeoisie is not a negative socioeconomic class.

There are two types of bourgeoisie.

In fact, being a member of the black bourgeoisie is like being Spiderman or Venom -- you can choose to use your power for good or for evil. Some use their black bourgeoisie power to judge others and to get ahead by any means, but there are magical righteous superhero black bourgeoisie who use their power to save some of the people who they grew up with.

Evil black bourgeoisie people tend to be light skinned black women.

Righteous superhero black bourgeoisie tend to be dark/brown skinned black men.

Madea is a coon with no reason for existing in the Tyler Perry universe.

The exception to the rule above is as follows: Madea draws black people -- who otherwise would not financially support a pseudo-political drama with Christian undertones -- to the box office to laugh at her hilarious antics, then jumps into the story at the end of the movie and transforms everyone she touches and brings about a magically impossible happy ending, that is, of course, a miraculous example of the power of Jesus Christ.

The end.